No Place Like Home(s)

My mom officially gets here in 11 days... meaning I have to condition my sleep pattern to get back to normal so I'm not up till 3am and then getting up with her at 7 or 8.

Due to the fact that my mom will be staying with me I will most likely be going blog-less for the week. This will be the first time my mom has actually STAYED with me so it's going to be pretty weird. I've never had a parent come and stay with me before... it's always been the other way around. Odd. Krystal will be in Toronto when my mom gets here though so at least we won't be too crowded in the house!

Tomorrow I'm getting my hair did... so hopefully it doesn't look too d-baggish... annnd I'm also going to book a few more bridal appointments. I've only booked the one so far but I needed to know a bit more about everyone's schedules before I booked anymore.

The wedding is just a little over a year away. Kind of crazy. It's pretty surreal still since it's still quite far off... but I think it's also hard to believe since I haven't had my parents here to share any of the wedding stuff with. Until this past Friday none of my parents (or family for that matter) have seen me since before Dario and I got engaged. I didn't get to show them my ring, I didn't get to have congratulatory hugs with them, I don't get to go through magazines with my moms to find all the cute ideas. It's kind of sad actually. They're not able to be included in any of the planning basically since they can't be here.

I think the whole wedding thing will hit me when I'm out trying dresses on and my mom is actually with me. That will probably be when I say, "weird... I'm going to be getting married."

I still find it kind of sad that I didn't get to share any of the engagement excitement with my family. A phone call just doesn't do it I guess.

Just one of those things in life you have to deal with because you moved away. It's going to be the same thing all over again when Dario and I start having babies. I won't get to tell my parents that I'm pregnant in person -- it'll be over the phone... and they probably won't be here for the births either. That's kind of hard to swallow, -- knowing that because I live 10 hours away my family will miss out on some of my most precious moments in life.

It's bittersweet I suppose. It all makes me so happy, but there's still a part that of course is sad. When you're as close with your family as I am with mine, you want to be able to share those important times, and my family and I will simply miss out on that. My future family will miss out on that. It definitely makes me appreciate the times I do get to see them a lot more, but ... imagine your parents not being there for the birth of your first/second/third (however many) child... imagine them not being one of the first people that get to hold your baby/babies. It's just weird.

I don't regret moving here, not at all... but I do find sometimes that I feel a little jealous for my family because Dario's family gets to experience everything, and my family gets to experience a lot less.

But again -- that's the nature of moving.

I'm always going to have that void. Unless my immediate family moves here, it's always going to be there. For now it's just worse because I still don't have a 'home' yet.

They say that home is where you make it... so I will find home a little over a year from now when Dario and I are joined to be the first members of our own family. The house we live in together -- that's going to be 'home.'